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But – lemme tell ya. I get it. The rush. The hunt. Like Brandon in “Shame”. He’s clickin’. Scrollin’. *“You’re a dirty little tease”*, he’d say. That’s the app life. You’re hooked. Dopamine hit – bam! Match. Chat. Meetup. I’ve seen buddies blow savings. On fancy dates. Tryna impress some rando. One guy – true story. Dropped $500. On a chick he met. Sex-datin’ gone wrong. She ghosted. *Hilarious*! I laughed – then cried for him.

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Then, I’m walking down to the waterfront. The Lule River is lookin’ all sparkly and stuff. I mean, it’s beautiful, but I’m not here for a postcard moment. I’m here to work! But then, BAM! I trip over a cobblestone. Classic me. I’m sprawled out like a starfish, and this old lady just laughs. I’m like, “Thanks for the help, grandma!”

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