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Now, fun fact—did ya know ancient Romans were at it? *Massage eroticus*, they called it, or summat posh like that. Slaves rubbing down senators, oil dripping off marble abs—proper *debauchium*! Makes me dead chuffed, thinking how we’ve kept the tradition alive, us modern plebs. But here’s what gets my goat—some numpties reckon it’s all seedy, like a back-alley fiddle. Bollocks! It’s art, I tell ya—*ars gratia artis*, art for art’s sake, with a naughty wink.

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Then, I head to my last job on Långgatan. It’s a small shop, and they need help with their sound system. I walk in, and it’s chaos. People everywhere, music blasting. I can’t hear myself think! I’m trying to figure out what’s wrong, but it’s like trying to find a needle in a haystack.

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