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About Uppsala

Yo, what’s good, fam? Sexual-massage, man, it’s wild! Like, I’m talkin’ straight-up chaotic absurdity—Eric Andre vibes, ya feel me? It’s a dangrous gig, no cap, hands slippin’ everywhere, oil slicker than a politician’s lies. I’m obsessed, tho—gets me hyped! Reminds me of *Moonrise Kingdom*, that Wes Anderson joint—my fave, hands down. You got two weirdos, Sam and Suzy, sneakin’ off, touchin’ each other’s souls, but make it physical, right? “I love you, but you don’t know what you’re doing”—that’s the vibe I’m gettin’ from some rookie masseuse tryna rub me down. Hilarious!

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I wrap up the auction, and as I’m packing up, the wind starts howling. I’m racing down the street, dodging raindrops like they’re ninja stars. I swear, I’ve never run so fast in my life! I’m soaked by the time I get to my car parked on Kungsängsvägen.

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