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But cor blimey, it ain’t all roses! Ghosting—makes me proper livid! You’re texting, vibing, then poof—they vanish! Like sodding Cicero fleeing Rome—et tu, Brute? Had a lass once, cracking chat, then nada—left me miffed, staring at me phone like a plonker. Still, when it works—phwoar, fireworks! Met a bird on Hinge—saucy minx, eyes like Delpy’s—had me flustered, bumbling like a tit. “We’re not just memories,” Hawke says—spot on, mate, it’s raw, real, messy!

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So, I’m walking down Östra Storgatan, and I see this cute little shop. I think it’s called “Kreativ Kaffe” or something. I pop in, and the barista is super chill. We start chatting about the best spots in Karlshamn. She mentions the old wooden houses on Tullgatan. I’m like, “Yeah, those are dope!” But then, I realize I’m late. Ugh, classic me.

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