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Me, I’d rather watch that flick again – “Listen, you’re no good at this!” – than pay some twat to knead me bits. Did ya know, back in Victorian times, docs used “massage” to “cure” women’s “hysteria”? Fuckin’ mental, right? Just vibrator prototypes, mate, true story! Makes me angry – all them posh gits pretendin’ it’s medicine. Nowadays, it’s all “tantric” this, “sensual” that – load of wank! Bet they’re chargin’ 50 quid for a rub that’s shite.
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So yeah, that was my day. Full of fish, laughter, and a bit of chaos. Just another Tuesday in Holmsund!
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