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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here talkin’ ‘bout sexual-massage like it’s the damn revolution we need! Picture this: you’re stressed, capitalism’s kickin’ your ass, and then—bam!—somebody’s hands are kneadin’ you into paradise. Sexual-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs, it’s a freakin’ art form, a rebellion against the 1% who think they own pleasure too!

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Next, I head over to the Hedemora Church. Wow, just wow. The architecture is stunning! I’m standing there, taking pics, and this old lady comes up to me. She’s like, “You’re not from around here, are ya?” I laugh and say, “Nope, just a lost soul.” She starts telling me about the history of the church, and honestly, I’m trying to keep my eyes open. I mean, bless her heart, but history can be a snooze fest sometimes.

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