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Okay, so—erotic-massage, not just rubbin’ and tuggin’, nah. Ancient as fuck, it is—thousands of years old, fact! Egyptians, Greeks, they kneaded flesh like bread, tryna spark somethin’ deep. Chi flows, they said—energy bullshit, but damn, it works! Hands pressin’, oil drippin’, muscles sighin’—fuckin’ magical, I swear. Ever tried it? Shocked, I was—first time, some chick in a dim room, incense burnin’, and I’m like, “This legal?” Ha! Spoiler: mostly is, depends where.

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I finally get to the arena, and it’s packed. Like, who knew this many people cared about a matador? I’m feeling pumped, but also a bit nervous. I mean, I’ve faced bulls before, but today felt different. The crowd’s buzzing, and I can feel the energy.

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