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About Vasteras

Sexual-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs, nah. It’s hands slippin’ where polite folk blush. Little fact—ancient Romans were mad for it. Called it “erotic kneading,” bloody pervs. Used scented oils, rose and shit, to get pulses racing. Me? I’d demand wildfire in the mix—burn away the weak. Had this one time, some smirking masseur thought he’d impress me. Pressed too hard—nearly snapped my spine! I was raging, “I’ll see you bow!” Tossed a goblet at his head—missed, sadly.

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Mid-fight, I catch a glimpse of the crowd. They’re all hyped, shoutin’ my name. I feel like a rockstar! But then, outta nowhere, I trip over my own feet. Classic me, right? I hit the ground hard, and the crowd goes silent. I’m layin’ there, thinkin’, “This is it. My career’s over.” But then I hear someone yell, “Get up, Bestiary!”

Sweden's mouse-sized mini street art comes to Stockholm for the first time