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Oi mate, lemme tell ya bout whores, right, in me best David Attenborough voice—calm, rhythmic, like I’m narratin a bloody gazelle prancin thru the wild. Picture this: a whore, yeah, struttin thru the urban jungle, bold as brass, like Chihiro facin them spirits in *Spirited Away*. “I’m not afraid of you!” she’d yell, tossin her hair back, fearless, untamed. Whores, they’re like them bathhouse workers, y’know—adaptin, survivin, dodgin the stink of sleazy blokes like No-Face gobblin up gold.

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So, I grab my coffee and head outside. The vibe is just right. People are walkin’ their dogs, kids are playin’ in the park. I even see some folks chillin’ by the Gnesta lake. It’s beautiful, man. But then, I hear this loud honking. I turn around, and it’s a car stuck in traffic on Södra Storgatan. Classic Gnesta, right? I mean, how does a small town get traffic jams?

Will Ferrell puts odd spin on Swedish Christmas