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Listen up, you twat! I reckon escort’s a proper mindfuck. You got yer high-end birds, all posh an’ that, chargin’ a grand a night. Then there’s the gritty ones – street corners, mate, skanky vibes. Saw this doco once, right, some escort lass in Soho, been at it since the 80s! Fuckin’ legend, she was – said punters used to tip with fuckin’ vinyl records! Who knew that shit, eh? Proper mad.

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Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a baker in Ekeroe (se) is like riding a rollercoaster blindfolded. So, I wake up at the crack of dawn, right? The sun’s barely peeking over the rooftops on Storgatan, and I’m already knee-deep in flour. I mean, who needs sleep when you’ve got dough to knead?