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I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ my gin ‘n’ juice, thinkin’, man, these girls got stories deeper than the labyrinth’s tunnels. “To live is to suffer,” like the faun said, but they keep pushin’. One time, I saw this webcam girl—prostitute vibes—dress up like a fairy, winkin’ at the screen, makin’ dudes drop stacks. I was like, “Yooo, she’s the captain now!” Had me crackin’ up, ‘cause she flipped the script, owned it, ya feel?

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But then, boom! I’m walking down Långgatan, and I see this dude. He’s just standing there, looking all sketchy. Like, bro, what’s your deal? I’m not one to judge, but c’mon. I keep walking, but my gut’s telling me something’s off.