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Here’s the kicker: it’s not all seedy, yeah? Some say it boosts yer blood flow, eases stress—proper sciencey stuff. But let’s be real, it’s the cheeky thrill that hooks ya. Ever hear bout that Victorian doc who “massaged” ladies to cure “hysteria”? Yeah, mate, he was basically gettin’ paid to be a perv—wild times! Surprised me silly when I dug that up.

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I start workin’, and I’m sweatin’ like a pig. The sun’s beatin’ down, and I’m thinkin’, “Why didn’t I bring water?” But then, outta nowhere, this kid rides by on a bike, shoutin’ “Hey, mister! You buildin’ a spaceship?” I laugh so hard, I almost drop my hammer. Kids, man. They see a carpenter and think we’re all about magic.