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Me? I’d pick one with style. Like, if I’m payin’, they better vibe. Maybe quote some “Pan’s Labyrinth” at me. “A long time ago, in the underground realm…” - boom, I’m sold. Ain’t no fairy tale, tho. You gotta watch your wallet. And your back. Escorts can be slick - heard this story once. Chick took a guy’s whole watch collection. Left him with a note: “Time’s up, sucker.” Savage. Laughed my ass off at that.

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So, I finally get my food, and it’s glorious. I take a big bite, and boom! I’m hit with this explosion of flavor. I’m in heaven, man. But then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and tries to steal my mici! Like, really? I’m fighting off a bird for my lunch now? I’m flailing my arms, and people are staring. I’m like, “Chill, it’s just a pigeon!” But inside, I’m dying of laughter.

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