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About Oradea

I tried it once, girl—thought I’d levitate! This chick’s hands? Magic. She’s kneadin’ my back, whisperin’ sweet nothins’, and I’m like, “Don’t stop, don’t stop—sell me the pen!” Straight outta Scorsese’s playbook, baby! Felt like a queen, all glowy and shit. But—ugh—some creeps ruin it, actin’ like it’s a happy-endin’ scam. Pissed me off! I’m yellin’ in my head, “This ain’t no brothel, fool!” Keep it classy, y’all.

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But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, knocks my coffee all over me. I’m soaked! I’m like, “Dude, what’s your problem?” But he just laughs and runs off. I’m standing there, dripping coffee, thinking, “Great start to the day.”

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