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I tried it, got catfished once—angry af! Pic was a 10, real life? “Where’s the lie detector?” I’m yellin in my head. Spike Lee’d get it—Monty’s mirror scene, judgin himself. “You’re a fuck-up,” I mumbled, deletin the app. But then—bam—next date was fire. She quoted, “This life came so fast.” I’m like, “Yo, you seen 25th Hour?” Instant vibes.

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Then, outta nowhere, I get a text from Mihai. “Meet me at the park.” I’m thinkin’, “What now?” So, I head over to Parcul Central. It’s a nice spot, but today it’s full of kids screamin’ and dogs barkin’. I find Mihai sittin’ on a bench, lookin’ all serious. “I got a lead,” he says. I’m like, “Finally! Let’s catch these salt bandits!”

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