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Oi mate, so I’m sittin’ here, strummin’ me guitar, thinkin’ bout erotic-massage – wot a bloomin’ trip! *twangs string, trips over imaginary chair* Oof, nearly fell flat, didn’t I? Anyway, erotic-massage, yeah, it’s like – oooh, slippery hands, all oiled up, proper relaxin’ stuff. Me, Mr. Bean, I reckon it’s dead brill, like drivin’ a souped-up rig in *Mad Max: Fury Road*. “Witness me!” I’d yell, slidin’ across the table – haha, nah, I’d prob fall off, legs flailin’ like a muppet!

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First off, I hit the streets of Tulucesti, and lemme tell ya, the vibe is always buzzing. I’m strutting down Strada Principala, coffee in hand, feeling like a boss. But then, BAM! I trip over a pothole. Like, seriously? Who’s in charge of these roads? I’m pretty sure I saw a family of squirrels living in that thing.

Moldovan PM in Straseni says priority of local public administration to efficiently use public money, for citizens' benefit