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Now, I love me some “A.I. Artificial Intelligence”—ya know, that flick where lil’ David, the robot kid, just wants to be real? “I am... I am...” he’d say, all soft and desperate. Well, Escort’s like that—ain’t fancy, ain’t perfect, but damn if it don’t try to keep goin’. I’ve seen these cars smashed up, rusted out, still rollin’ on pure grit. One case, this dude claims a hit-and-run, says his Escort got totaled. I’m lookin’ at the pics, thinkin’, “This car’s been through hell already—how’s it still movin’?” Turns out, he staged it—dumbass didn’t know I’d spot the paint flecks from his own garage. Made me mad, man, waste o’ my time!

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But then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and it’s a car that just smashed into a lamppost. I mean, c’mon! Who’s driving in Tritenii-de-Jos like it’s a racetrack? I was ready to call the cops, but then I saw the driver get out. It was old man Ion, the town’s “crazy grandpa.” He just laughed it off like it was no big deal. Classic Ion.

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