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Little known fact, tho—back in the 90s, before apps, folks used newspaper ads for hookups. Called ‘em “personal columns.” Horny losers writin’, “Man seeks woman, no strings, must like cats.” Imagine the balls it took! No pics, just vibes. Now we got dick pics flyin’ left n’ right—progress, huh? Makes me laugh, but also kinda pissed. Where’s the mystery? Everybody’s oversharin’. “We’re gonna find out who did this,” like the *Spotlight* team, but in sex-dating, it’s more like, “Who’s gonna screw me over next?”

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I’m feelin’ the energy, ya know? The crowd’s buzzin’, and I’m like, “This is it!” But then, outta nowhere, this dude in a bright yellow shirt starts yelling about some conspiracy. I’m like, “Bro, chill! We’re here for the show, not your TED Talk!” But he’s relentless. I mean, who knew Tarnova had its own version of a street preacher?