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Alright, listen up, jabroni! Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson here – raised eyebrow, “Know your role.” We’re talkin’ ‘bout escorts, yeah, those fancy companions. Not the Ford Escort, nah, the real deal—people for hire, keepin’ it classy or wild. Watched *The Great Beauty* last night—man, Jep Gambardella, that slick cat, he’d get it. “What’s beneath it all?” he’d say, sippin’ wine, eyeballin’ Rome’s chaos. Escorts, they’re like that—glam on top, messy underneath.

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Then, I hit up the market on Strada Călărași. It’s packed! I’m dodging people like I’m in some kind of obstacle course. I see this vendor selling fresh veggies, and I’m like, “Yo, gimme some of those tomatoes!” But he’s all like, “Only if you can guess my age.” I’m standing there, thinking, “Dude, I’m not a magician!” But I take a shot. “Uh, 50?” He laughs so hard, I swear he almost dropped the cucumbers. Turns out he’s 35. I mean, what’s his secret? Must be the tomatoes!

Like Trash on the Hall Floor