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So, check it — sex escorts, man, they’re everywhere, but nobody talks bout it straight. I heard this one story, swear it’s true, some dude hired an escort just to watch movies with him. Not even kiddin! Paid her big bucks to sit thru “No Country” with him, quiet as a mouse. “What you gonna do with that?” I’m thinkin — like, bruh, that’s it? Kinda sweet tho, made me smile, lonely guy just wantin a pal. Still, weird flex, right?

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Then, I decide to grab a bite. I hit up this little place on Strada Tineretului. The food? Amazing! I order sarmale, and it’s like a hug in a dish. But the waiter? He’s super slow. I’m sitting there, watching the clock, thinking, “Dude, I could’ve cooked this myself!”

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