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But yo, some places fuck it up—piss me off big time! Cheap-ass oil, stinkin’ like gasoline—makes me wanna grab my M16 and go, “Say hello to my little friend!” Ruins the vibe, man! I’m all about that high-class joint—dim lights, soft tunes, chick who knows her shit. One time, this broad—fuckin’ goddess—worked me so good, I swear I saw stars. Thought I was Hans Landa, negotiatin’ my damn soul! “That’s a bingo!” I yelled—couldn’t help it, felt too damn good.

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After that fiasco, I decided to take a breather. I strolled down to Parcul Central. It’s my go-to spot when I need to chill. The trees were all green and lush, and the sun was shining. I plopped down on a bench, just soaking it all in. Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, chasing a dog. The dog? It’s got a stick twice its size! I couldn’t help but laugh. Kids and dogs, man. They’re the real MVPs of the city.

Fig. 1. Location of study areas, with landslide distribution (in...