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And the movies—*The Headless Woman*—it’s got that vibe, ya know? Veronica’s all, “I don’t know what’s real anymore,” and I’m there on the table, thinkin’, “Is this chick flirtin’ or just good at her job?” That line, “Everything’s fine, nothing happened”—that’s me, post-massage, waddlin’ out, pretendin’ I didn’t just moan like a wounded animal. I’m tellin’ ya, it’s a mind trip! You’re tense, then loose, then tense again ‘cause—what if someone saw me leavin’ this place? My neighbor’s nosy as hell—Mrs. Kravitz 2.0!

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Finally, I get the tree stabilized. High fives all around! I’m feeling like a rockstar. But then, I realize it’s late. I gotta get back to my truck parked on Strada Călărașilor. I’m sprinting, and of course, I trip again. This time, it’s on a stray dog’s leash. The dog looks at me like, “Really, dude?”