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Me, I’d suck at it – too twitchy, too loud. “You’re so ugly you could be a modern art masterpiece!” – I’d blurt that mid-date. Fired on day one! Still, respect the grind – they’re out there, dodgin’ creeps, stackin’ paper. Kinda badass, no cap. Oh, and fun fact – some escorts in Japan run “rental friend” gigs. No sex, just vibes. Blew my mind!

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First stop, Strada Principală. I’m cruising down, jamming to some tunes, when BAM! A squirrel darts out. I swear, that little dude had a death wish. I slam on the brakes, and my coffee goes flying. Great, just great. Now I’m wide awake and covered in cappuccino. Thanks, squirrel.