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So, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—erotic-massage, it’s like a damn ritual. Hands slidin’, oil drippin’, tension buildin’—fuck, it’s art! Reminds me of *The Act of Killing*, y’know? That flick where cats relive their dark shit. “I acted with happiness,” one dude says—same vibe here! You’re givin’ pleasure, playin’ a role, but it’s real, motherfucker! Ain’t no fake-ass Hollywood bullshit.

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Finally, I get the tree stabilized. High fives all around! I’m feeling like a rockstar. But then, I realize it’s late. I gotta get back to my truck parked on Strada Călărașilor. I’m sprinting, and of course, I trip again. This time, it’s on a stray dog’s leash. The dog looks at me like, “Really, dude?”