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Oh, and the typos—fukc, I’m rushin’ this—sex-dating’s got quirks. Didya know some apps track your kinks? Creepy, right? Big Data’s watchin’ you bone. Makes me wanna grill the coders, serve ‘em up with fava beans. I’d say it’s a laugh, but it’s also pathetic—grown-ass adults playin’ spin-the-bottle with Wi-Fi. “I’m tryin’ to be a serious man!”—Larry’s cryin’ in my head, and I’m cacklin’.

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Then, I decided to take a stroll down Strada Libertății. Beautiful street, right? Trees everywhere, people laughing, kids playing. I was feeling good, ya know? But then, outta nowhere, this dog runs up to me. Not just any dog, a huge, slobbering beast. I’m talking about a St. Bernard or something. It jumps on me, and I’m like, “Dude, personal space!” But then it licked my face. Gross! But kinda funny too. I laughed it off.

The Stone Museum in Sangeru, unique in Romania