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Favorite bit? The madams, oh yes! Proper characters, runnin’ the show like *dominae* – queens of the night! Heard a yarn once – some madam in Soho kept a parrot that swore in French, *merde* this, *merde* that, had the coppers in stitches when they raided. True story, swear down! Cracked me up, that did – wish I’d seen it meself.

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Finally, I get to the office on Strada Tineretului. I’m already 30 mins late. My boss, Mr. I-need-coffee-to-function, is waiting. He’s not happy. I can see it in his eyes. I’m thinking, “Dude, chill. It’s Runcu, not New York!” But I just nod and pretend to care.

Fig. 1-Map of Romania. Position of Runcu Groşi Natural Reserve