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Alright, girl, buckle up! Erotic-massage, huh? I’m Tina Fey, snarky as hell, and I can see Russia from my house! Let’s dive into this slippery topic. So, picture this—me, obsessed with “The Pianist,” that Polanski masterpiece, brooding vibes, right? I’m thinkin’ erotic-massage coulda saved Szpilman’s hands from all that war misery. “I wanted to cry out!” he’d say, but nah, a steamy rubdown instead? Yes, please!

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First off, I hit the streets of Ruginoasa. You know, the usual spots—Strada Principală, where all the action is. I’m just strolling, minding my own biz, when I bump into this kid practicing soccer. He’s got mad skills, but he’s also got a temper. He kicks the ball, and boom! It hits me right in the leg. Ouch! I’m like, “Dude, chill! I’m not your goalie!” But he just laughs and runs off. Kids, man. They’re wild.

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