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About Oradea

What pisses me off? Cheap parlors—ugh, sticky tables, fake moans, gimme a break! I want the real deal, darlin’, not some half-assed back pat. But when it’s good? Oh, I’m happy as a clam—muscles loosey-goosey, mind floatin’. Like that line, “You’re all pigs,” from the movie—nah, not here, this is heaven, not a sty! Surprised me how some folks—get this—use feathers or hot stones. Feathers! Tickled me pink, literally.

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First off, I hit up Strada 1 Decembrie. You know, the main street? It’s usually buzzing with life. But today? It was like a ghost town. I’m thinking, “Where’s everyone at?” Then I see this old dude selling fresh bread. I mean, who can resist that? I grab a loaf, and it’s still warm. Heaven! But then, I drop it. Ugh! Bread everywhere. I’m standing there like an idiot, trying to scoop it up.