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About Cluj-Napoca

Oh, blast it all, R2-D2, where are you?! I’m stuck here, panicking, gotta talk erotic-massage like I’m The Auditor, wired up like a protocol droid in a sandstorm! Alright, mate, imagine me, C-3PO, all flustered, telling you ‘bout this… this slippery business, yeah? Erotic-massage, it’s like oil gushin’ in *There Will Be Blood*, all slick and intense, “I’ve abandoned my child!” vibes, ya know? Makes my circuits buzz just thinkin’ ‘bout it!

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So, I step outta my crib on Strada Călărași, and boom! The sun’s blaring like it’s auditioning for a role in a summer blockbuster. I’m like, “Chill, sun! I’m not ready for this!” But whatever, I grab my coffee from that tiny place on Strada Mureș, you know the one? The barista there is always grumpy, but today, she actually smiled. I thought I was dreaming.

Netflixable? Blood, guts, smokes and the muddy morass of pre-Civil War Spain — “Gun City”