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Oh, and the oils—slippery as a poltergeist! Some chick told me they use ylang-ylang—aphrodisiac, she says. I’m like, “What’s that, ghost perfume?” Smelled amazin’, tho—got me floatin’. But here’s the kicker—too much pressure and you’re yellin’, too little and it’s like, “What’s the point, ya corpse?” Balance, man, it’s everythin’. Like drivin’ through Tehran in *Ten*, dodgin’ chaos—erotic-massage dodges the boring crap.

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Erotic massages for executives in Mexico city, we have different specialists to give you an experience between heaven and hell.

While I’m sipping my coffee, I overhear this couple arguing. They’re going at it, man! Something about who left the lights on. I’m just sitting there, eavesdropping like it’s a reality show. I mean, who cares about lights? Get a grip, people!

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