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But the creeps? Ugh, dodge ‘em! Dudes begging nudes in two secs—piss off, yeah? Makes me wanna ram their heads with a pallet truck. Still, when it works, it’s gold. Met this one bird, pure sass, said, “I’m no princess, mate.” We clicked, banged, laughed—felt like Amélie’s Paris streets, alive, messy, real. Sex-dating’s a rollercoaster, bruv—ups, downs, and epic crashes. “Tonight’s the night,” I say, every damn swipe. You in or what?

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After that, I headed back to the office, and guess what? My computer was working again. Of course! Just when I thought I’d lost my mind. I finished the report, sent it off, and felt like a champ. But then, my boss called me in. My heart dropped. What now? Turns out, she loved it! I was like, “Wait, what?!” I mean, I was ready for a lecture, but instead, I got a compliment. Crazy!

Dr. William Haglund Testifying at the Trial of Radovan Karadzic