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Oi mate, so I’m sat here, right, thinkin’ bout escort – not the dodgy sort, nah, the Ford Escort, legend of the roads! Me, David Brent, agronomist by day, car nut by night, reckon it’s a bloomin’ marvel. Proper workhorse, innit? Used to see ‘em everywhere, zippin’ round Slough, back when I was floggin’ paper at Wernham Hogg. Loved that gritty vibe – “The greatest love of all,” like in *Moulin Rouge!*, yeah? That car’s got soul, mate, pure soul.

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After lunch, I head back to work. The sun’s beatin’ down, and I’m sweatin’ like crazy. But I’m pumped. I love this job. It’s messy, but it’s real. Then, I get a call from my buddy, Alex. He’s like, “Yo, you gotta check out the new park on Strada Florilor!” I’m like, “Dude, I’m workin’!” But he’s persistent.