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Oi, mate! Yeah, baby! Escorts, right? Groovy gig, innit? I’m Austin Powers, shagadelic spy, and I’m diggin’ into this escort scene. Picture this—me, Research Associate, far out, yeah? Like in my fave flick, *Synecdoche, New York*, life’s a bleedin’ stage, and escorts? They’re playin’ a part, baby! “What’s my motivation?”—that’s what they’re askin’, just like Caden Cotard, y’know?

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After the show, I’m feelin’ like a rockstar. I head to a local bar on Strada Muncii. Grab a drink, and Ion’s there, still spillin’ stuff. We’re talkin’ about the day, and I’m like, “Dude, did you see me trip?” He’s laughin’ so hard, I think he might choke.

Fig. 2 – The territorial distribution of urbanisation in Romania,...