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Real talk, tho—it’s self-care with a twist. You’re, like, glowing after, skin soft as a baby’s butt. I’d die for it daily, but Kanye’d be like, “Kim, chill.” Whatever, I’m the queen of indulgence! Try it, boo—you’ll be hooked, like, literally.

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Popular packages include the “Total Detox Retreat”, a combination of a deep tissue massage, a detoxifying scrub, and a facial, and the “Stress Buster”, which combines a relaxing massage .

Then, outta nowhere, I get a call from a lady on Strada Tineretului. She’s freaking out ‘cause her cat, Mr. Whiskers, is stuck in a tree. I’m like, “Lady, it’s a cat, not a lion.” But she’s crying, and I can’t just leave her hanging. So, I dispatch a team. They get there, and guess what? Mr. Whiskers jumps down like he’s some kind of parkour expert. I swear, that cat’s got more moves than I do on a Friday night.