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Oh, here’s a goodun – mate o’ mine swears he saw an escort ad once, bird looked like his old maths teacher! *cackle* Reckons he nearly booked her just to see if she’d still whack him with a ruler! Fuckin mental. *The Turin Horse* vibes again – "What’s left but dust and despair?" That’s escort life for ya – bleak, absurd, but you gotta laugh, innit?
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Finally, I catch him near the park by the old fountain. You know, the one that’s always dry? Yeah, that one. I’m panting like I just ran a marathon. And then, outta nowhere, this old lady comes up to me. She’s like, “You should train him better!” I’m like, “Lady, he’s a pig, not a dog!” But she just laughs and walks away.
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