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But here’s the kicker—everybody lies, even the masseuse. Says it’s “spiritual,” but her smirk’s screamin’ “tip me big, limp.” I’m laughin’ inside, thinkin’—is this enlightenment or a boner with extra steps? Probs both. Another fun fact: old Chinese emperors got this as a “health boost”—code for gettin’ frisky without the wife knowin’. History’s wild, man.

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The bar is packed. I walk in, and my friends are already there, laughing and having a blast. I join in, and we start sharing stories about our day. I tell them about the coffee spill, the arguing couple, and the sweet old lady. We’re all cracking up, and I realize, despite the chaos, today was pretty awesome.

Li-Wei Lee, Ioan Leu (Published 2012)