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Hey pal, so I’m an accountant, right? Crunchin’ numbers all day, borin’ as hell, but then—bam!—sexual-massage pops into my brain like a freakin’ tax loophole! I’m Tina Fey, snarky as shit, “I can see Russia from my house!” and lemme tell ya, this ain’t no gentle rubdown. Sexual-massage? It’s wild, it’s messy—like Son of Saul messy, ya know? “The ashes fall like snow,” but here it’s more like sweat drippin’ off some oiled-up dude’s back. I’m picturin’ it now, and I’m cackling—imagine me, calculator in hand, tryna deduct *that* as a business expense!

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After a few beers, I decide to head to the market at Piața Centrală. Man, that place is a sensory overload. The smells, the colors, the people! I’m walking through, and I see this vendor selling fresh pastries. I can’t resist. I grab a cozonac, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. Seriously, if you haven’t tried it, you’re missing out.