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Gets me riled up, all this pretendin’. Happy? Nah, never – surprises me though, how daft punters are. One geezer, swear down, paid an escort to just sit there, silent, like some livin’ statue. “Her breathing’s enough,” he says – mate, you’re off yer rocker! Reminds me of that film line, “She’s alive, but not really.” Creepy, innit? We’s gobsmacked, precious – who’s that lonely?

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But then, we get to the park, and it’s packed. Kids running around, families picnicking, and I’m like, “Where did all these people come from?” I’m trying to find a quiet spot to play, but it’s chaos. I’m getting a bit annoyed, but then I see a kid with a guitar. He’s struggling to play “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star.” I can’t help it; I jump in and show him a few chords. His face lights up, and I’m like, “This is what it’s all about!”

Stan Serbanica, of Chatham | Obituaries