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Here’s the kicker: it’s not just sexy-time nonsense. Docs reckon it boosts blood flow, chills ya out—sciencey stuff. Surprised me, that—thought it was all pervy vibes. But nah, it’s legit—like, medieval monks used it for “healin’.” Bet they blushed somethin’ fierce. Me, I’d exaggerate it—tell the lads I’d get a massage so good I’d levitate. “Kneel before your king!” I’d yell, struttin’ round the yard.

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So, I grab a bun and head to the market on Strada Măgurii. It’s packed, like sardines in a can. People everywhere, haggling over tomatoes and stuff. I’m just trying to get my coffee fix, but the line is longer than my to-do list. I’m standing there, tapping my foot, thinking, “C’mon, people! I need caffeine!”

Comedian Tom Burgess on why Peter Cook made him want a piece of the custard pie