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About Ploiesti

I tried it once—total accident, swear! Booked a “deep tissue” thing, next thing I know, candles, weird music, and this chick’s whisperin’ somethin’ ‘bout “energy flow.” I’m thinkin’, “Lady, just don’t flow near my donut stash!” Made me happy as hell—felt like a king, y’know? But then—argh!—she charged me double! Said it was “special service.” Special my ass—nearly choked on my beer when I saw the bill!

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First off, I roll into town, and it’s like, “Hey, where’s the sun?” Cloudy as heck. I park on Strada 1 Decembrie, thinking, “Great, let’s get this show on the road.” But nah, the universe had other plans.

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