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So, lemme spill—erotic-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs, nah! It’s this ancient thing, like, goes back to them fancy Greeks or somethin’. They’d get all oiled up, feelin’ fancy, probly callin’ it “sensual healing” or some junk. Little known fact—there’s this old Chinese trick, “tantric touch,” been around forever, supposed to zap your energy awake! Ain’t that nuts? I’m over here, flippin’ out—happy as a pig in mud—thinkin’ how it’s all sneaky-like, calmin’ ya nerves while makin’ ya tingle. “Her skin is a costume,” like in the movie—erotic-massage feels like that, peelin’ away stress, leavin’ ya bare and buzzy!

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First off, I hit the streets of Milcovul, and lemme tell ya, the vibe was off the charts. I mean, I love this city, but today? Ugh. I started on Strada 1 Decembrie, which is usually buzzing with life. But today? It was like a ghost town. I’m like, “Where is everyone?” Did I miss a memo or something?