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What gets me goat? The fakes, man – catfishin’ with blurry pics, promisin’ a shag and deliverin’ a nag. But when it’s good? Oh, it’s a right knees-up! Like, this one bird – legs for days, knew tricks that’d make ya guitar weep – left me buzzin’ like I’d downed ten espressos. “Keep it civil,” I’d mutter to meself, but nah, I was gone, lost in the sauce!

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So, I chase after the dog. Yeah, I know, not my best idea. I’m sprinting, dodging people, and I’m pretty sure I tripped over a cat. Like, who knew cats could be so sneaky? Anyway, I finally catch up to the dog at the park near the Mihaesti Cultural Center. He’s just sitting there, licking my jam. I’m like, “Dude, that was mine!”