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So, sexual-massage—it’s this wild mix, right? Hands slidin’, oils drippin’, and I’m like, “Is this allowed to feel *this* good?” I get happy—oh, so happy—when they hit that spot, y’know, the one you didn’t even know was screamin’. But then—anger! Some bozo therapist goes too fast, like, “Slow down, pal, this ain’t a race!” I’m payin’ for the full hour, not a sprint! Surprised me once—didja know in ancient Rome, they had these “massage parlors” too? Rich dudes gettin’ oiled up by slaves—wild, right? True story, look it up.

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When I get there, the office is a mess. Papers everywhere! I’m talking tornado-level chaos. My colleague, Ana, is frantically searching for something. Turns out, she lost the report on the new irrigation system. I’m like, “Seriously? We just talked about this!”

LAST MINUTE Official Lots Announced by Sorin Grindeanu for Important Highways in Romania