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About Bucharest

So, sexual-massage—it’s old as dirt. Ancient Rome had these “massage parlors,” wink-wink, where senators got their togas in a twist. Little known fact: Japan’s got this soapland gig—girls slather you in suds, slide all over, fuckin’ wild! I tried it once—holy shit, slippery as hell, nearly broke my damn neck, but damn, I was HAPPY. Like, “We’re alive, we’re alive!”—straight outta the movie, that rush of survival, but hornier.

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After that, I’m walking down Strada Mihai Viteazul, and I see this stray dog. Poor thing looks like it hasn’t eaten in days. So, I pull out a piece of my precious cheese (the one I didn’t drop) and give it to the dog. It’s like I’m a hero or something. The dog wags its tail, and I’m feeling all warm inside. But then, it starts following me! Great, now I’m a shepherd with a dog sidekick.

American TRW Automotive plans new factory in Romania