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I’m HYPED tho—met this chick once, total “Blue” vibes. She’s all, “Your skin tastes like summer,” quotin’ the movie in bed—WHAT?! Blew my mind, fam! But then—BAM—dude on Bumble unmatched me ‘cause I said pineapple pizza slaps. Weak! Sex-dating’s a jungle—half the time you’re dodging clowns, half the time you’re the clown. Hella funny tho, like, who’s out here TYPIN’ “u up” at 3 a.m.? ME, that’s who!

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As the sun sets, I stroll down Strada Florilor. The colors are insane. I’m feeling all philosophical, like, “Life’s a rollercoaster, man.” I stop for ice cream. Best decision ever. I’m sitting there, enjoying my cone, and I think, “Maybe today wasn’t so bad after all.”

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