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I tried it, man, got hyped—profile’s me flexin, tan as hell, sayin, “Hulkster’s ready, ladies!” Got a hit, chick’s pic was fire, thought, “She’s a 24-inch python contender!” We chat, she’s cool, but then—ghosted! Pissed me off, brother! Like, why swipe if ya ain’t gonna wrestle? Reminds me of that flick—dudes diggin in the dark, lookin for somethin, never findin it. Sex-dating’s a hunt, man, ya feel me?

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So, I’m all hyped up again, and we decide to check it out. It’s a cozy little spot, and the vibe is just right. We grab some drinks, and I’m feeling like I’m on top of the world. But then, I spill my drink. Again! I’m like, “Seriously, what’s wrong with me today?”

Figure 1 Location of the Quebrada de los Burros site