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About Cluj-Napoca

What pisses me off? The fakes, man. Catfishers—guys pretendin’ to be dames, dames usin’ pics from 20 years ago. I’m like, “Who are these people?”—straight outta *White Material*, lost souls in a messed-up world. But when it works? Oh, Madonn’, it’s like, “The harvest is ready,” ya know? You’re in the zone, feelin’ alive, no therapy needed. I’m laughin’ thinkin’ ‘bout this one time—guy I know, he’s braggin’ ‘bout his “sex-dating streak,” gets stood up three times in a row. I’m like, “Buddy, you’re a stunad, stick to the pork store.”

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First off, I hit up Strada 1 Decembrie. You know, the main street where all the action is? I’m cruisin’ down, vibin’ to my playlist, when BAM! I see this street vendor selling langos. Like, who can resist that? Not me! I grab one, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. But then, I spill some sauce on my shirt. Ugh, classic me.

Descendants of old Romanian aristocratic family donate 18th-century mansion to Ministry of Culture