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Ever tried it? Mate, it’s nuts—half massage, half somethin’ else, wink wink. Not just horny rubbish tho—helps with stress, blood flow, all that jazz. Surprised me, tbh, didn’t expect the science bit. Oh, and the oils—lavender, eucalyptus—smells like heaven, or maybe a posh brothel, ha! “We’re like goddesses!”—that’s *Spring Breakers* again, me feelin’ godly after a good rubdown.

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Finally, we get back to the school, and I’m sweating bullets. I’m thinking, “This kid’s gonna kill us both.” But then, he cracks a joke about the cat, and I can’t help but laugh. Like, how do you go from panic mode to stand-up comedian in 2 seconds?

Mercure hotel to open by the Danube Riviera