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I tried it once, fam. App had me like, “Yo, she fine.” Then she unmatched me—rude as hell! Felt like that scene, “Justice is an act of love,” but nah, justice was her ghostin’ me. Made me mad, yo. Like, why even swipe? Wasted my data plan for that? Pshh. Still, some folks out here winning. Heard this dude met his wife on Tinder. Swiped in 2015, married by 2018. Wild statistic—only 12% of hookups turn serious. Rest is just sweaty regrets.
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Finally, I get to work. My boss, Mr. Ionescu, is already on my case. “Where’s the report?” he barks. I’m like, “Chill, dude! I just got here!” But he’s all about deadlines. I swear, he’s got a personal vendetta against my sanity.
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