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What pisses me off? The fakers. Profiles promising a wild night, but they ghost ya. Like that tape in *Caché* – mysterious, then nothin’. I’m ragin’! But when it works? Oh, mate, it’s glorious. Met this bird once, legs for days, proper filthy in bed – I was happier than a pig in shit. Surprised me, too, ‘cos usually it’s all talk, no cock. Sex-dating’s a minefield, but the gold’s worth it.

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Then, boom! Another call. A lady on Strada 1 Decembrie is freaking out. Her cat’s stuck in a tree. I’m like, “Lady, it’s a cat, not a lion!” But I get it. Cats are drama queens. So, I dispatch someone to rescue Mr. Whiskers.

Israeli investor in Romania shifts back to real estate sector